Monday, November 9, 2009
-2:55 PM
Sometimes, I feel like I am made used of by others, and I do not know how to refuse them.
Especially when the world out there is so competitive, it sucks to let people gain a foothold on you.
When we go back to the Bible, God tells us,
"Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up. Therefore, as we have opportunity, let us do good to all people, especially to those who belong to the family of believers." (Galatians 6:9-10)
Hebrews 13:16: "But do not forget to do good and to share, for with such sacrifices God is well pleased."
God, watch over me.
Saturday, October 31, 2009
-12:09 AM
"And here I am to worship,
Here I am to bow down,
Here I am to say that You're my God;
You're altogether lovely,
Altogether worthy,
Altogether wonderful to me" -- Here I am to Worship, Tim Hughes
You're the God of my life, today and forevermore.
All praise be to You.
'I love the King and the King loves me.'
Thursday, October 29, 2009
-8:31 AM
i often feel a tinge of awkwardness and inadequacy whenever the conversation topic moves to being attached.
almost everyone i've known have had a boyfriend/girlfriend before.
but i don't.
i don't (or at least i hope) think it's because no one loved me to that extent before,
but the answer's closer to the fact that i've never allowed anyone so close to my heart before.
but why?
like everyone, i long for love, and everything that comes with it.
but why do i shut the door in their faces before we even have a chance to know each other more than mere friends?
i have many close guy friends, but the only reason why we are so close,
is because i'm aware of the impossibility of us getting together, and they too, of course,
either because they're attached or we're such close buddies.
i like that, i prefer that.
but once a guy tries to enter into my life,
like every normal girl, i enjoy attention and closeness with a guy,
but once i feel that the line is crossed,
i start backing out and edging away,
because i'm afraid he'll get the wrong idea,
and i wouldn't want anything to happen.
i decided there were 2 possibilities:
1. i'm afraid of getting hurt
2. my family history (dad)
i wonder when i can disentangle myself from this mess that no one sees, only me.
i hope, i can move on, at the appropriate time, and God will find the right one for me. (:
2 Timothy 1:6-7: "For this reason I remind you to fan into flame the gift of God, which is in you through the laying on of my hands. For God did not give us a spirit of timidity, but a spirit of power, of love and of self-discipline."
God has blessed us with spiritual gifts and we have a calling in our lives,
we've to quieten our hearts and listen to what God has to say to us,
and be obedient to the direction he points us towards.
He has everything planned, to fulfill in his time.
So in the meantime, let's trust him with all we have.
We've 'a spirit of power, of love and of self-discipline', let's make sure we demonstrate them through our lives.
Wednesday, October 28, 2009
-6:45 PM
it seems like i've swerved off course,
and i find it hard to get back on track,
hard to start studying very very hard.
i don't even know how to study anymore,
i have lost all my confidence.
my mind wanders much.
i get distracted and bored.
i feel like curling up into a ball, and hide in a dark corner,
become invisible, and let people just pass me by.
don't look at me, because i'm lesser than you think.
i wonder, if Christians are ashamed of being 'too holy' in front of their friends,
but if our heart burns with passion for Christ,
why are we afraid of proclaiming it to the world?
“You are the light of the world. A city on a hill cannot be hidden. Neither do people light a lamp and put it under a bowl. Instead they put it on its stand, and it gives light to everyone in the house.” -- Matthew 5:14-15
Lord, I want to shine for you,
will you let me?
-8:10 AM
专心仰望耶稣既然有这么多的见证人
像云彩围绕我们
就应当放下各样重担
脱下缠累我们的罪
既然有这么多的见证人
像云彩围绕我们
以坚忍的心向前奔跑
那摆在我们前面的路程
让我们专心专心仰望耶稣
那信心的创始完成者
以合一的心并存忍耐
奔跑我们前面的路程
让我们专心 专心依靠耶稣
旷野中的安慰引领者
以喜乐的心并存盼望
奔跑我们前面的路程
i love this song!
it talks about how there are many witnesses of Christ on this Earth,
how we should put down our burdens and sin,
and persevere in running the race of life before us.
At the same time, let's fix our eyes on Jesus,
who is the basis of our faith,
and our comforter in times of trials,
no matter what let's press on, with happiness and hope. (:
can i do that?
Before the world began,
God "chose us in Him before the creation of the world" (Ephesians 1:4),
and "[i]n him we have redemption through his blood, the forgiveness of sins, in accordance with the riches of God's grace that he lavished on us with all wisdom and understanding" (Ephesians 1:7-8)
God hand-picked each and every one of us, knows us by name,
and we are all part of His grand plan.
He has given us boundless spiritual blessings.
We are all significant to Him, no matter how lousy we feel inside,
and there is no greater honor, our significance is found in Christ.
-1:55 AM
i'm so sad :(
i got a B-. i looked at it many times, in disbelief.
but things won't change.
why am i so stupid? my scholarship, how?
could it be due to my expressed lack of faith in God
and my horrible laziness?
sigh. i really don't know how.
it seems like i have lost my motivation, too.
bad time.
as i wallow in my sorrows, the things i have to do are piling up.
i so wanna quit school.
In psalms 119:71-72, "It was good for me to be afflicted so that I might learn your decrees. The law from your mouth is more precious to me than thousands of pieces of silver and gold."
i guess in life, we suffer hard knocks now and then.
it's unbearable, and you feel like you're falling apart, breaking down into pieces,
but is it possible to learn from them?
perhaps it may be hard to swallow the idea of the believer learning from painful and difficult circumstances in life, and value the Word of God,
but i realize whenever i'm weak and down, i run back to God, always.
He gives me strength, every time.
"Here is my servant whom I have chosen, the one I love, in whom I delight;
I will put my Spirit on him, and he will proclaim justice to the nations.
He will not quarrel or cry out; no one will hear his voice in the streets.
A bruised reed he will not break, and a smoldering wick he will not snuff out, till he leads justice to victory.
In his name the nations will put their hope."
-- Matthew 12: 18-21
"Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything." --James 1:2
-4
Will I be able to stay strong through it all,
will I be able to get through this?
Lord, be with me.
Monday, October 26, 2009
-7:41 AM
it's so early in the morning, and i'm dead tired.
it's the beginning of the week all over again,
and need i remind you the weekend flew past, without me doing much work.
I NEED TO CATCH UP. i shall start revising SOON.
i've 29 days left. and i'm no where near prepared. Lord, HOW?
in matthew 6:9-13, we see the Lord's prayer,
"Our Father in heaven,
hallowed be your name,
your kingdom come,
your will be done
on earth as it is in heaven.
Give us today our daily bread.
Forgive us our debts,
as we also have forgiven our debtors.
And lead us not into temptation,
but deliver us from the evil one."
It probably encompasses all the reminders that we need in our daily lives,
but when we try to live it out, we realize it isn't that easy.
There are things in my life i have not come to terms with,
and things i try to avoid tackling and solving.
but God gives to us our daily bread,
and all we have comes from God alone.
