lifesong
Everyone needs compassion
And love that never fails
Let mercy fall on me
When everyone needs forgiveness
Kindness of the Saviour
The Hope of the nation
Saviour, He can move the mountains
My God is mighty to save
He is mighty to save
Forever author of salvation
He rose and conquered the grave
Jesus conquered the grave
So take me as you find me
All my fears and failures
Fill my life again
I give my life to follow
Everything that i believe in
Now i surrender
Shine a light in and
let the whole world see
Singing, for the glory of the risen king
Jesus, Shine a light and
let the whole world see
Singing for the glory of the risen king
Thursday, October 29, 2009
-8:31 AM
i often feel a tinge of awkwardness and inadequacy whenever the conversation topic moves to being attached.
almost everyone i've known have had a boyfriend/girlfriend before.
but i don't.
i don't (or at least i hope) think it's because no one loved me to that extent before,
but the answer's closer to the fact that i've never allowed anyone so close to my heart before.
but why?
like everyone, i long for love, and everything that comes with it.
but why do i shut the door in their faces before we even have a chance to know each other more than mere friends?
i have many close guy friends, but the only reason why we are so close,
is because i'm aware of the impossibility of us getting together, and they too, of course,
either because they're attached or we're such close buddies.
i like that, i prefer that.
but once a guy tries to enter into my life,
like every normal girl, i enjoy attention and closeness with a guy,
but once i feel that the line is crossed,
i start backing out and edging away,
because i'm afraid he'll get the wrong idea,
and i wouldn't want anything to happen.
i decided there were 2 possibilities:
1. i'm afraid of getting hurt
2. my family history (dad)
i wonder when i can disentangle myself from this mess that no one sees, only me.
i hope, i can move on, at the appropriate time, and God will find the right one for me. (:
2 Timothy 1:6-7: "For this reason I remind you to fan into flame the gift of God, which is in you through the laying on of my hands. For God did not give us a spirit of timidity, but a spirit of power, of love and of self-discipline."
God has blessed us with spiritual gifts and we have a calling in our lives,
we've to quieten our hearts and listen to what God has to say to us,
and be obedient to the direction he points us towards.
He has everything planned, to fulfill in his time.
So in the meantime, let's trust him with all we have.
We've 'a spirit of power, of love and of self-discipline', let's make sure we demonstrate them through our lives.
